The Toilet Bowl

My family lived in Hawaii for a few years while I was in college, and I would go there for Christmas and summer breaks. (Rough life, huh?) When in you live on Oahu, Waikiki is not the beach to go to, unless you just love hanging out with all the tourists. For awhile, I really enjoyed going to Hanauma Bay, because of the Toilet Bowl.

The Toilet Bowl is a six-ish-foot deep hole in the rocks where the current washes in and out of every few seconds, filling the hole with water and then emptying itself again. Depending on the force of the tide, it can "flush" rapidly and forcefully, which can be fun...or dangerous. Here's a video clip I found on youtube to show you what it looks like.

One day, the tide became stronger than I could handle, and I got pulled under water, rumbled around in the current, and couldn't find which was up in order to put my feet down in the sand. Another wave came before I got straightened out, and with that one, I was pushed down under the curve of the rock. With the next wave, I was able to get air, but the rocks were too smooth down there to get a handle to pull myself out. I felt trapped and scared.

A big Hawaiian guy who was in the Bowl at the time saw what was happening and reached down to save me. He grabbed me by one of my upper arms and literally flung me up over the rocks as if I was a doll. (And compared to him, I was!) But again, those rocks were slick, and the waves were coming fast, and I accidently slid back in...unfortunately right back into the hole I'd be stuck in before. He grabbed me once more, threw me hard over the top of the Bowl, and growled at me, "DON'T get back in!!!"

Believe me, mister, I didn't want to! My swimming wasn't strong enough to handle the waves of the current that day, and my skinny little college body wasn't big enough to pull myself out. I needed that big Hawaiin guy to rescue me. But I was smart enough to listen to him and walk away once he'd pulled me out from the hole and thrown me over the rock to safety.

Life lately has reminded me a bit of that scene at the Toilet Bowl. Every day at school is one wave after another, hitting me with such force and speed, that I feel the adrenaline rush of fear and excitement. Some moments are fun and thrilling. Other moments feel like I'm drowning under a rock. Honestly, most days I don't feel like my faith is strong enough to handle swimming in this particular bowl.

Every morning starts with the Lord pulling me out of the drowning hole and placing my feet up on the solid rock of safety. He doesn't fling me, nor does He growl at me not to get back in. Instead, He teaches me how to swim better.

I have to admit that I am not very graceful right now. My faith looks (to me, anyway), like I'm flailing my arms in every direction, kicking my fins like a 4 year old who has just figured out how to use the paddle board, and keeping my eyes clutched shut for fear that water will get in them. Anything I learn during my quiet time each morning seems to wash out to sea with the first wave at school.

My mean classmate shoots her hate darts at me, and I forget to love.

My teacher makes stereotype jokes at my expense, and I forget to be humble.

My Muslim classmates push Islam and I forget to be patient.

This week, I had just about had it and wanted to call whoever I needed to call to say, "I'm done. I'm getting out of this Toilet Bowl (school). I'm getting off this island (Besançon), and I'm going back to my comfort zone (Marseille)." The Lord reminded me of something.

He is patient with us.

He's in it with us.

He rescues us when we are drowning and cry out for help.

He doesn't mind that my swimming doesn't look pretty right now. The point is that I keep getting back in the water every day to bravely face those waves.

I'm hoping they'll buffer off some of the dross and I'll come out as smooth as those rocks in Hanauma Bay.

"But He knows the way that I take; when He has tested me, I will come forth as gold." Job 23:10