Campbell's Cream Soups

A billion years ago when I lived in Portugal (yes, I am that old), I discovered that Mr. Campbell was a genius. Why? Because he invented a condensed soup, marketed that soup, and then sold that soup. (Actually, it was Mr. John T. Dorrance who invented condensed soup. But Campbell sold it, so I'm going with him...) While that may not seem genius to you... open any American woman's pantry and you will find Mr. Campbell hanging out in there. Read any recipe for any type of American casserole and it will include a can of cream of whatever soup...brought to you by Campbell's. I'm telling you, he was a genius.

So there I was in Portugal with no idea how to cook, and every recipe I encountered called for a date with Mr. Campbell. Who was nowhere to be found in Portugal. And so I learned how to make a basic white sauce that could then be turned into a cream of whatever sauce for casseroles. I've been doing it ever since.

The thing is, cream of chicken is not so easy. Because I don't have canned chicken broth either. So I tend to usually just make cream of mushroom instead and deal with it.

Well, one day a few weeks ago, I walked into the grocery store, and there was a half-shelf full of Campbell's Cream of Whatever soups! They had cream of asparagus, cream of tomato, and cream of mushroom. And for only 2.37 euros a can!

(My mother shrieked at that price. You can't think about how much 2.37 euros is in dollars. You have to think in relevance. Relevant, in this case means "something within the 2-3 euro price range is not overpriced, especially when it is a hot-commodity contraband item from America." Relevant really does mean that. You can go look it up...in the bettercountry's American Living in France Dictionary.)

I bought every can of cream of mushroom that they had, and gave several away to friends. On a later trip, I wanted to buy a few more to stock up, but they had never re-filled the shelves from my last shelf-cleaning visit. As I turned away, I noticed a can of cream of mushroom on top of the asparagus, in the very back. I called one of the stockers over and asked if she'd pull it down for me.

"Are there any more cream of mushroom's up there in the wrong spot like this one was?" She looked through all of them and found one more can. Then I said, "I know you're not the one who orders the food, but if you tell your manager...the recipes that Americans use (it was on the English aisle), they all call for cream of mushroom or cream of chicken. If you stock cream of chicken...we Americans will buy it!"

(Visions of "if you build it he will come" just flashed through my head...)

She told me she'd tell her manager, and I cynically thought, "No you won't. You don't care if Americans would be in Campbell's creamy bliss." But the next time I went back, I saw...

Restocked shelves...with CREAM OF CHICKEN SOUP!!! However, they cost 6.90 a can, and well, I've lived without cream of chicken this long, I can keep living without it at that price. (There's relevant, which is 2.37, and there's just plum crazy, which is 6.90). I walked away and figured I'd wait until they realized no American was going to pay that much and they ought to lower the price.

So today, at first glance, I saw that 6.45 over on the right. Then I looked at it again, and realized that was the price for PEANUT BUTTER. The far left price, 2.31, is for cream of asparagus. The middle one is blank. The third from the left is 2.27 for cream of tomato. Could it be? Did they change the price of the cream of chicken?

I grabbed a can and carried it up front, and asked the check-out lady how much. 2.10!!! Woot!

No, I didn't buy every can...today. My shopping cart was already full and a girl can only pull so much up a Marseille hill. But tomorrow... those cans are mine!

Thank you, Mr. Campbell. Thank you, Monoprix, for marking it down to a relevant price. Casseroles will soon be coming to a Marseille table near you...

Some completely useless trivia for you should you ever go on Jeopardy and they have a Campbell's category for you to choose from:

• The red and white colors on the label reflect the colors of Cornell University's football uniform.
• The gold seal in the middle of the label was the symbol of the 1900 Paris Exhibition.
• Cream of Mushroom soup is one of the top 10 items sold in US grocery stores every week.
• One of Andy Warhol's Campbell's Soup prints sold for 11.8 million dollars.