The 10 Magic Words

Surely you've heard the stereotype that French people are rude. I've spent the last four years of my life telling Americans that the stereotype isn't true: Americans just don't know how to play by French rules, and thus...the French respond in what seems like rudeness to Americans who haven't played by the rules.

When I first arrived in France almost four years ago, I read a book on French culture that talked about the 10 MAGIC WORDS. This book explained that if you memorize the 10 magic words in French, and use them, you'll be golden. The French will be as sweet to you as any of those delectable treats you see in their baker's windows.

And what are the 10 magic words? "Excuse me for bothering you, but I have a problem." My personal experience has been that I don't even need to say I have a problem, but just, "Excuse me for bothering you, but..." and then fill in the blank with whatever I need from the person.

CSI and I signed up for language school online last week, and then received emails stating that we needed to come pay for school before the course starts next week. I was talking with a friend about our plans to go in and pay for school the next day, and she began to tell me about the school's director.

"Make sure you're super nice to her. She can make or break your experience at the school, and students who've gotten on her bad side are miserable. She adores my husband, so she's nice to me...but make sure you win her over straight away."

Those of you who know me know that I'm not always the best at "winning people over straight away." It can take me months, even years, to win people over. So needless to say, I was a little nervous about this first meeting.

I put on my power outfit. (The French always respond to a fashionably dressed woman, right?)

CSI and I prayed for mercy and favor both last night and this morning before we went in.

Then, I knocked on the office door, pushed it open, took a deep breath, entered and said...

"Excuse me for bothering you, but I'm looking for the Madame director?"

Thank God for the 10 magic words (and a good power outfit). She was very nice to us, and chatted it up with me about my name, and how cold it is here in Besancon (I woke up to below freezing temps this morning!), and told me all that we would need to get started in the school, asking me to translate it all for CSI. We left the office feeling like it was a total success and we'd charmed The Lady With a Reputation for Meanness.

It all makes me feel like I wish I'd known those 10 magic words from childhood on...